Some words from Harry

TV highlight of the week was the cafe fire at Emmerdale.
That takes the number of fires in Emmerdale up to 23 in fact in the 30 years since it's been on the screen there has been 23 fires 39 deaths 17 car crashes and a plane flying into the top of it. In fact it's like the Bermuda triangle.
Despite this appalling record on health and safety Viv took the batteries out of the smoke alarm
I knew there was going to be a fire.

He first bumped into Viv, your not the stalker she asked?
They talked of the fire when Harry told her she shouldn't have take the batteries out the smoke alarm
she said she thought it was the thing that told her when her toast was ready.
Whilst on the subject of highly inflammable things Viv was asked how many cans of hair spray she used
3 in the morning and 3 at night she replied. When told it was highly inflammable she said she had no idea and asked what he suggested.
He said he would like her to wear an asbestos hat.

Next passed the Woolpack selling "loose petrol" from a dustbin.

On to the B&B with Rodney fireworks and a cigar.
Which Harry promptly put out in the firework box.

Alvin Stardust was next showing Viv the green cross code.
Back in the studio Harry showed how to recreate the closing shots of Emmerdale with broccoli.